What A Year

One year ago I wrote an introduction to Marla. We had already been talking for a few weeks previous to that. In so many ways it doesn’t seem like it has been a year, but in others it seems like it should have been far longer. Everything happened so quickly, she was [...]

March 12th, 2010 by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
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What I Don’t Need

At some point before I’ve talked about relationship needs, that is the needs of the relationship, but in the last few months something that has been extremely important for me to realize has been a different sort of relationship need, that is, a lack of need.
When I was younger a relationship or, more accurately, the [...]

March 6th, 2010 by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
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Spiraling Forward

Well, I’m officially moving back to Seattle. I have a one-way ticket for March 17th.
This seemed like an impossibility at the end of November, the end of the triad, and part of me is surprised at the way things turned out, yet I’m also not surprised.
I still feel guilty for the way things ended, [...]

February 24th, 2010 by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
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Death, Rebirth, and Submission

Clutched by notoca
When the triad first started we talked a lot about how it would change my relationship with Onyx. We had to get rid of the monogamous-type relationship we had developed over the years and move into an open polyamorous one and then also to incorporating Marla into the mix. I talked [...]

January 22nd, 2010 by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
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Reflections and Refractions

Of all the pain and disaster of everything that has happened there have at least been some good things.
I have learned a lot, both about myself and about what I desire in another person. When forced to make a choice between Marla and Onyx I chose neither, and through that choice learned who was [...]

January 18th, 2010 by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
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Protected: More Honesty

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January 18th, 2010 by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
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If I Was Really Honest with Myself…

…what would I say?
This question has been running through my head over and over since everything happened in November. I’m still processing everything, but life must go on in the meantime as much as I want to pause it and analyze and figure things out before continuing I, unfortunately, do not have the ability [...]

January 8th, 2010 by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
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In 2010…

Of the things I said I wanted to do in 2009 I didn’t do too badly, actually. Some of these things are the same, and some are different.
Get my body piercing license! – My biggest goal, which I hope I will be able to do in a year, but that will depend on when [...]

January 6th, 2010 by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
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In the Year 2009

The ever-so-popular year-in-review post, much like my In the Year 2008 last year. So, this is a little late, but I’m still posting it anyway! The new year is always a good time to reflect on the year before and look forward to the year to come, so here’s my reflecting.
In 2009…

I moved [...]

January 6th, 2010 by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
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Rediscoveries

Now that I am somewhat outside of the relationships that have consumed me and took over my life for the last eight or so months I find myself getting more in touch with my needs. I am glad to have so much alone time and time to focus on me as me rather than [...]

January 5th, 2010 by Scarlet Lotus St. Syr
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